Friday, January 14, 2011

"You can't make me!"

When I asked Mr. Stinky to brush his teeth he said, "You can't make me!" and I said, "You are right." and continued with what I was doing.

We cannot physically force our kids to do anything, BUT we can implement logical consequences. The logical consequence in our home for not brushing your teeth is no sweets.

Mr. Stinky is learning that when I am so agreeable he is not going to like the consequence. He gave me a funny look and scurried into the bathroom to brush.

Have I mentioned that I LOVE Parenting with Love and Logic? It sure makes my life easier.

**Side Note:
When your kids ask for a treat put on your most empathetic/sad voice and say, "Oh, that's a bummer. (Put arm around them.) Boys/Girls who don't brush their teeth don't get anything sweet." and then walk away.

Whatever you do DO NOT threaten this consequence at the time of the brushing confrontation.


Family of 4.... said...

I like this one. I'm going to totally use it for the next teeth brushing, LOL.


QuackenBaby said...

My 6 year old pre-adoptive daughter has been sending out an SOS lately for some help, but she's so combative and irrational you can hardly stand to be in the same room with her.

We're changing up medications to see if that is the problem, but I really think the Love and Logic books might be a good place for us to start with getting her to a predictable parenting style from us.

We've read tons of books and have awesome friends with RAD kids... but I really need to change it up for her and for us because we're beginning to bang our heads against the wall!

What book(s) from the Love and Logic site do you recommend starting with for a chronologically 6 year old that is emotionally 3, physically 9, educationally 6, but thinks she is a 21 year old with all of the answers to life?!?! :)

My email is if it's easier to email your reply.

Trauma Mama said...

I would recommend you start with Parenting with Love and Logic. From there you might find a Love and Logic class near you at

I have put an Amazon Link on the side of my blog.

We did a lot of head banging before L&L too. It was not pretty.

QuackenBaby said...

I bought the book tonight! I think my husband is more excited than I am. Hoping to see some improvement in everyone's behavior (including my own)!

Trauma Mama said...

Wonderful! Let me know how it goes. I'll warn ya, it is tough to put into practice "in the moment" when you first get started. It does get better though.